Thursday, September 14, 2006


03.007 – DD-13

20BBY/3.02 – Mwahahahaha! Finally, my experiments bear fruit!

My fool of an assistant, FX-6, actually managed to ‘purloin’ a suitable subject for my newest exploration into the realms of creation.
A gungan, no less!
Not only will this pathetic lifeform be a perfect recipient for my latest limb technologies, but I can also test my new mind-amalgamation technique.
I have just dispatched FX-6 to find me a suitable donor for the brain swap.

20BBY/11.6 – I had to give FX-6 a sound whipping for his ineptitude.
A donor, I said. He brings me a goober fish.
The limbs are ready for replacement. All I have to do is remove the current ones…
I love my job.

20BBY/33.01 – Partial success.
The cybernetic limbs took extremely well to the gungan’s torso, and the mind-amalgamation yielded surprising results. The subject actually scored higher on an aptitude test with a goober fish brain.
I must make a note of this.
Unfortunately, the first field test was somewhat of a disaster.
FX-6 led the cyber-gungan to the domed atrium at the base of this med-facility, to put it through its paces you might say.
What does it do?
It immediately does a triple back flip with a half pike into the nearest pond, instantly shorting out its limb circuits and sinking to the bottom like a sack of Hutts.
FX-6 is due for another good thrashing.

20BBY/9.34 – Master Sidious has instructed me to be ready, as he claims to be bringing me a fresh specimen. I am busy designing the limbs and body casing as we speak.

20BBY/12.8 – Master Sidious rejected virtually every design I offered him. He didn’t go for the lilac, plasti-steel armor, nor the red trim and flame decals. Instead he plumped for a rather dull black number. The mask isn’t even finished yet. A bit more tweaking and I can fix that annoying rasping sound coming from the breathing unit, but he claims he is pushed for time, and so I will have to do a half-baked job.
He even rejected the goober fish option.

20BBY/25.7 – Well, the patient arrived and he was in a pretty bad shape, I even had to call in a couple more FX units to treat his burns. I didn’t have to remove the excess limbs, someone had prepped him for surgery. Thoughtful.
We have eight hours before Master Sidious returns, so I think we have time to try out some new ideas before then…

20BBY/15.6 – FX-6 has just received his third thrashing of the day.
Why do I put up with his incompetence? While adjusting the patient’s lower limbs, he tightened one leg more tightly than the other, resulting in a length differential of 18 microclicks. When we tested the walk cycle, the patient did indeed manage to take long, menacing strides, just as Master Sidious had ordered. However, he could only stride in a circle.
Back to the old drawing board.

20BBY/4.04 – The roller blades were a bad idea.

20BBY/20.1 – Success! My creature lives!
I have dispatched the other FX units so that they may not bask in my reflected glory, and now Master Sidious is here.
I have just activated the life support unit and raised the platform to aid the patient’s first steps in his new suit.
My, he looks beautiful.

Master Sidious is whispering something in the patient’s ear.
The patient doesn’t seem very happy about something.

Oh my…

Please! Calm yourself! Someone, play a soothing tune….


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